excuses, excuses

Ever since i got my 'gowear fit' calorie management system, i have gotten many inquiries about it.  I wear it on the back of my upper left arm and depending on the length of the shirt sleeve, it's sometimes visible.  People are surprisingly eager to ask me about it.  The first few times i was happy to share what it was but i got tired of the same old story and when strangers ask me i have come up with a list of excuses as to why i am wearing this contraption on my arm.

1. when i push this little green button, i turn invisible.  (and i smile like i belong in a padded cell)
2. part of my 'house arrest' agreement, can't go more than 50 miles from home.
3. if i die, this sends a signal to a detonation device on a freighter sitting in the ocean and it will explode killing everyone on board. (see LOST)
4. it's a GPS device and alerts me when i have gone is the wrong direction.
5. it's part of my shock therapy for anger management...so don't anger me unless you want to see me catch a jolt.
6. the aliens gave it to me after the anal probe so they can find me when it's time for me to join them


GoWear Fit:  it's a calorie management device. THE BIGGEST LOSER tv show passes out something similar called a Bodybugg to it's contestants.  i wear it on my arm and it measures my heart rate and body heat and other things that i don't understand because i am too much of a layman.  it takes that data and turns it into a series of reports that i can read telling me several things.  my activity duration and level.  my caloric output by the minute, how many steps i take.  it monitors my sleep.  it sounds an alarm that i preset to alert me when i need to eat.

it's pretty cool and totally worth the price if like me, you are trying to watch what you eat and get more exercise.